“Ma’am, can you tell us which one of these men stole your purse?” CONGRATULATIONS TAB!! You GO, scary girl! Hello word, here’s a song that we’re singin’ C’mon get happy! Some of the cuts on the men were SCARY-looking. Half of them came out looking...

GOD, we love this show. “Seriously, stop it with the hedge clippers, okay? You’re embarrassing the rest of us.” “Oh, looks like someone’s a little threatened by my innovation. Sorry Danna, you’ll have to come up with your own ingenious method.”...

That’s it. Blog over. There’s nothing more to write about. Our world has gone cold and gray. Oh Evangelin. Our little Italian Tammy Faye. Our Madonna of the Garden Shears. Our under-voweled, over-accessorized Mama of Drama. How can we go on without you? What will we write about?...

These drama queens can’t even make phone calls without turning it into a soap opera. No “Hi! Just checking in. I miss you!” with this bunch. No, it has to be HIGH DRAMA 24/7. “Okay, calm down. I need you to focus. You should see a red wire and a blue wire.”...

DELICIOUS bitchery this week, darlings! Tyson and Tabatha, two Persian cats pissing and hissing and establishing their territories. LOVE. IT. Of course one of these fluffy little balls of bitchery is seriously out of his league. Someone needs to warn Tyson that the men who cross Tabatha tend...

GAY FRODO?!?! NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! LACEY?!?! Oh. Well, the judges were clear last night: no kids at the grownups table. And TWO eliminations! Black is white! Up is down! Nothing makes sense anymore. We may need a couple days to recuperate from the drama. Actually, we loved the double...

Miss Daisy! Doll, we know you had a shitty time this week but HONEY? We LOVED it! Delicious tension as chatty bubbly hair stylist tries to be diplomatic with her bitch of a wig stand! “Okay, like, I know you really, really want to look like Christina Aguilera – and that’s...

Darlings, if there’s one thing we love more than bitchy reality show contestants, it’s bitchy reality show judges. None of these bitches even try to keep it off their faces and that is of course, delicious. Even better, they’ll openly talk shit right in front of the...

We had absolutely NO plans to write about this show and we weren’t even sure we were going to watch it. I mean, how much can you write about hairdressers? Good lord, were we wrong. We first started hearing the buzz about it through our little “Bravo grapevine” and to be...