Darlings, it was the Vanity Fair Oscar party! Where people who weren’t invited to the main event get dressed up and people who were invited to the main event get dressed down! Let’s judge! Abbie Cornish in Tommy Hilfiger Simple and perfect.   Amy Adams in Vivienne Westwood...

Darlings, it was the 2012 Film Independent Spirit Awards. Sort of an Oscars pre-party where everyone dresses shitty because they know they can.   Adepero Oduye Honey, no. We’re sorry, but no. Back in the limo you have to go. Those sound like the opening lines of a Dr. Seuss book...

Did Elizabeth get a new stylist? Because she’s always been a fairly underwhelming presence on the red carpet, but she’s really turning it out lately.   Elizabeth Banks attends the premiere of  ”Man on a Ledge’” in Los Angeles in an Emilio Pucci dress paired with Christian...

We’ve given Elizabeth a hard time on the red carpet before. We couldn’t actually tell you why, because she doesn’t have a personal style that actually registers to us or stays in our memory. We just remember not really loving her red carpet choices pretty consistently. And...

It’s odd. We consider ourselves among the world’s foremost experts on all things Project Runway, but we just don’t recall hearing anything about Elizabeth Banks being a guest judge. Elizabeth Banks attends the premiere of “Our Idiot Brother” in Los Angeles in a...

Second verse, same as the first, bitches. Annasophia Robb in Malandrino Pretty, with some attention-getting visual interest. Not a bad choice, but the Minnie Mouse pumps were too safe. Cameron Diaz in A.L.C. She’s kind of distressingly monochromatic but the shoes are ultra-fab. Cassie...

Darlings, it was the BAFTA “Brits To Watch” event, held at the Belasco Theatre in Los Angeles, California, which we think should have been titled “Brits to Watch – And Then Say Something Bitchy about Their Clothes,” but no one ever listens to us. In the interest...

Are you still, with us, brave minions? There’s still a TON of dresses to rip, so don’t falter now!  People are counting on you. Our country is counting on you. Or your country is, depending where you are. Anyway, the point it, there is no day off when you’re a bitch....

Darlings, it was the 2011 White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner at the Washington Hilton on April 30, 2011 in Washington, DC. As the saying goes, “Politics is show business for ugly people,” so let’s see who they shipped in to pretty the place up, shall we?...

If the Oscars are Hollywood’s prom, then the parties afterward are Hollywood’s Sophomore Dance, when every celeb with a publicist comes crawling out of their holes, straps on some shit-ugly clothes, and parties their ass off for the night, having no idea how ridiculous they look....

You’re all well-trained minions, aren’t you? You know the drill: Tom Ford Flagship Store Opening in Beverly Hills, celebs posing for pictures, bitchy people on the internet offering opinions no one asked for. We good? Okay. Let’s move ‘em on out, people. Amber Valetta...