HA! You didn’t think we could do it, did you? Well, it’s still Monday (even if you’re probably not going to read this until Tuesday at the earliest), which means that come hell, high water, or shitty wireless internet connection because our DSL line STILL isn’t hooked...

We’re BACK, bitches! You didn’t think we could do it, did you? Well, we can’t find anything and the phone isn’t hooked up yet, but goddammit, we found a wireless connection and we’re bringin’ it!So! The Harvey Girls! Let’s go! Our film opens as all...

Girl. Honey, we can’t really count ourselves among your biggest fans, but you’ve always provided us with the pleasure of making fun of your clothes or bitching at you for charging people to listen to your vocal exercises, so on some level you HAVE provided us with some...

Yes kids, it’s time for On a Clear Day You Ca– oh, forget it. Look, the plot is all the hell over the place on this one and most of the songs are forgettable. We’ll try to keep up, but really, the only point to this movie is Barbra’s hair, makeup and wardrobe, all of...

Nick Verreos and David Paul debuted their Resort/Spring 2008 Nikolaki Collection at the W San Diego Hotel on August 16th and it’s appropriately dramatic, goddess-y and FIERCE, girl!               After the show, Nick served drinks as the celebrity...

This has been all over the celebrity blogosphere the last couple of days, but we just can’t resist a chance to rag on that entitled bitch, Gwyneth Paltrow. Her latest cover for W: WHAT. THE. HELL? Foregoing the fact that she looks like a ’70s porn star in this picture, we...

The fabulous Kara Janx recently unveiled her Fall 2007 collection and we have opinions, darlings!  That very high-waisted balloony skirt thing is a KJ staple. It’s cute, but it’s definitely for the very young and very thin. Love these two. A more tailored look than...

Yes, it’s time for that American Classic, Singin’ In The Rain! The story that teaches the valuable lesson: Watch out for those dumb girls, they can be real bitches when they want to! Our story starts here, on opening night of what’s sure to be the blockbuster film of 1927,...

Yes ladies, it’s time for Gypsy! The story of the Worst Mother in the World, and the daughter she whored out in a sad attempt to give her life meaning! It’s like the Patsy and JonBenet story set to music! With tassles! Our story starts here as little Louise Hovick and her little...

You better love us, bitches. Because we bring you the scoop! “Good grief” turns into fashion relief as MetLife presents a group designer fashion show featuring exclusively designed fashions for Snoopy on September 7 at 6 p.m. as part of Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week at Bryant Park....

Number two in a series.   The FABULOUS Grace:   Allison: Cara (who looks better in photographs than she does on video): Claudia: Danyelle – gorgeous and chameleon-like: Eden – DAMN girl, those are some LONG legs!: Heather: Rachael – she ain’t no marshmallow:...

Yes kids, it’s Thoroughly Modern Millie! Because we just can’t seem to get Julie Andrews out of our systems – and because it’s one of Lorenzo’s favorite films and he pouted and stamped his feet to get his way! Kidnapping! Sex slavery! Offensive racial...

After being pregnant like 9 times in the last 4 years, Frau Seal reminds everyone just why she’s called THE BODY in the latest issue of Arena magazine in a spread that was apparently shot on a very hot day. She looks gorgeous! Safe for work, but just barely.   Are those...

Previously on Musical Monday: A lark who is learning to pray…a flibbertigibbet…to face a world of men…doorbells and sleighbells and schnitzel with noodles…a drink with jam and bread…one little girl in a pale pink coat heard…small and white, clean and...

This is IT, bitches! We told you we’d come back with something extra-special for you!It’s The Sound of Music! Nuns! Nanny-fuckers! Nazis! My word, we’re breathless just thinking about it!   Take it away, Julie! Meanwhile back at the abbey, The Reverend Mother hears that...

Let’s take a look and see what some of our favorite season one models have been doing, shall we, kittens? We shall.     Jenny: Mary: Julia – working a retro look, for which she’s well-suited: Allison: Josiane: Audrey: Martinique – gorgeous: Erin: Melissa...

Sources tell us that two Bravo reality show contestants, one from Project Runway and one from its culinary rip-off, were seen canoodling recently in Manhattan. Can you guess who? Hints: they’re heterosexual; they both made it far in their respective competitions; one is beloved, with...

Yes girls, it’s Gigi! The story of a young French girl who finds love despite her grandmother’s sick attempts to train her for a life of prostitution!The year? 1900! The place? Paris! The Bois de Boulogne! The players? Perverted old Frenchmen and snotty high-priced whores in...

Yes girls, it’s Gigi! The story of a young French girl who finds love despite her grandmother’s sick attempts to train her for a life of prostitution! The year? 1900! The place? Paris! The Bois de Boulogne! The players? Perverted old Frenchmen and snotty high-priced whores in...

Yes, it’s Royal Wedding! The slightly disturbing story of a brother-sister entertainment duo and their inappropriate relationship! Our story starts here, as Tom & Ellen Bowen (Astaire and Jane Powell) are closing out their hit show in New York by grossing out the audience. Brother...

Yes, it’s Hello, Dolly! The story of an annoying pain in the ass with a great set of pipes and an endless supply of vagina hats and the menagerie of dimwits who let her rule their lives! We’d never seen this before and, oh Jesus, now we know why. This movie sucked. Our story...

Yes, it’s Summer Stock! A glorious technicolor throwback to the simple days when a barn could double as a multimedia entertainment center! Our story starts with Judy as farmer Jane Falbury. Once again, Judy allowed the legion of homosexual costumers to put her in something outrageously...

Darlings, New York Mag has even more pictures from the CFDA event, and we figured we’d rip on every PR guest judge we could find. Zac Posen: No. Absolutely not. First off, it looks like it’s at least one size too small. Secondly, it looks like an upholstered couch – in 1960....

Now that Shear Genius is done, we wanted to get back to the kinds of posts we envisioned for this blog when we first started out: bitchy, judgmental screeds about whatever pops into our heads. We’re a couple weeks late on this topic, but that’s fine by us. We never did like being...

“In its effort to recognize the outstanding contributions made to American fashion by individual from all areas of the industry and related arts, the CFDA hosts the annual CFDA Fashion Awards. Awards are given for journalism, creative vision and lifetime achievement.” More here...

Yes kids, it’s Guys and Dolls! A musical tribute to misogynistic gambling addicts and the dumb girls who love them! Before we get started, we have to pay tribute to probably the greatest character in the whole movie: the fantastic Times Square set, which wisely put forth the idea that...