Oscars 2010 Part 3

Posted on Mar 9, 2010 in Fashion

We did the gay gasp when we saw her. She has a history of looking like she just rolled out of a very tiny and uncomfortable bed before hitting the red carpet and in the past year or so switched that up for showing up looking like someone’s mom on the red carpet. It’s nice to see that she can still bring the glam and the sexy when she wants to. We don’t think she ever looked so good, to be honest.

This is like depression in dress form. It’s sad, it’s ill-fitting, it’s unflattering, and yet despite all that, it’s ultimately forgettable. Awful choice.

At the time, we tweeted that we weren’t crazy about the color, but we were wrong, kittens. It’s actually a lovely color. And a gorgeous dress. We would have advised more volume in the hair to balance out the volume in the skirt. Right now, she looks a little like a pinhead.

We realize minimalism is CK’s thing, but this dress is so minimal it barely exists at all. And the lack of color doesn’t help her.

Gotta give it up for everyone’s favorite closeted lesbian vampire lover. Despite the fact that everything about her facial expression and posture indicated that she hated where she was and what she was doing, the dress does look pretty spectacular on her. It’s a great color.

At first, we were like, “Oh, how tasteful for Mimi.” Then she flashed Seacrest her vagina and he burst into tears on camera in front of millions, thereby ensuring everyone of his raging, testosterone-fueled heterosexuality. We should have known better. Mimi doesn’t do tasteful.

Beautiful dress and beautiful color. Maybe when she’s 80 she’ll start showing her age. Hell, for all we know, she IS 80.

Bitch.

Maybe this is unfair and maybe we’re being a little bitchy (perish the thought) but our first thought upon viewing this dress was “anorexia coverup.”

Having made THAT incredibly bitchy comment, it is a pretty fab dress and we dig her eye makeup.

We really tried to like this dress. We viewed it up close, from far away, standing on our heads, you name it. But it just isn’t a pretty dress. It’s a weird dress. Between this and Diane Kruger’s sad shredded dress, Uncle Karl did not have a good night on the red carpet.

And while we originally applauded her gigantic Streisand-esque ‘do, further evidence revealed that her hairdresser apparently ran out of serum. Seriously, what is up with all those flyaways?

This dress starts off as a good idea and winds up dropping the ball on the details. That sash and that sequined thing on her shoulder pretty much ruin it. Take those away or trade them out for something more tasteful and this could have been a great look for her.

Also, we really kinda hate that hairstyle. It’s so bland. You’re a movie star, not an assistant office manager. She’s still a strikingly beautiful woman and a more stylish cut could do wonders for her.

Haters always gotta hate. This dress has been getting a lot of criticism from angry troll-like people who live in holes and scream at the sight of the sun. We think it’s fun, it’s fabulous, and it’s designed to make everyone in the room look at you. We love it and consider it one of, if not THE, top looks of the night. The only thing we don’t love is that sort of reverse peplum around the waist. It’s a little inelegant.

[Photos: gettyimages.com/wireimage.com/style.com]

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Labels: Cameron Diaz, Elizabeth Banks, Julianne Moore, Kristen Stewart, Mariah Carey, Michelle Pffeifer, Nicole Richie, Oscars, Red Carpet, Sarah Jessica Parker, Sigourney Weaver, Zoe Saldana

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