Virgins v. Vixens

They’re back!

Yes, we know your favorite hardscrabble divas have been gone for too long and yes, we open every Vv.V post with an apology for taking so long and a promise to do better next time (like a lousy lay), but there were so many shows to blog and collections to rip, kittens! Besides, the last matchup got over 600 votes that had to be hand-counted. It’s wonderful to have tens of thousands of minions on the internet, but what we really need is one or two to hang around our desks, waiting to be given something to do. Cute ones, preferably. Who don’t feel the need for shirts.

Anyway. If you haven’t encountered V v.V, you can find a pretty good rundown of most of the previous bouts here. You missed some doozies.

The votes are finally counted and we don’t want to tell you the results!

Oh, fine:

Seriously, ladies? And by that we mean actual ladies. Had the gayboys in our audience been voting in greater numbers, this never would have happened. You can’t go up against straight women and their princess fantasies unless you have a strong contingent of gay men with diva fantasies. Princess Grace was just too much for Liz (we hate you all for making us type that), and she went down, not for the first time, most likely.

This week, the only thing new in the ring is the combination, as

Dusts herself off, checks her flawless skin in a compact, fluffs her hair, and turns to greet her next competitor….

MISS SOPHIA LOREN

Well-rested, and high on the wins from her three previous bouts, the fan favorite steps into the ring confidently. It’s all on the line with this fight. The winner of this bout goes on to the final round against the ultimate virgin/vixen.

Ready? Vote!