2009 MTV Movie Awards

Posted on Jun 2, 2009 in Fashion

It’s the 2009 MTV Movie Awards, darlings!

Cameron Diaz in a Matthew Williamson top paired with J Brand jeans and Giuseppe Zanotti boots.

She only has about twenty minutes, guys. She just dropped her dog off at the groomer’s and then she has to run out to pick up her drycleaning and get her allergy prescription filled. Take your pictures now because she’s a busy girl with places to be.

Cameron honey, you’re on this side of your thirties and you are appearing at an event LOADED with tiny little starlets on THAT side. Put a little effort in, girl. You’re looking a bit like a volunteer chaperone at a school dance.

CariDee English in Christian Siriano Spring 2009

PR IN THE HOUSE. She looks cute and the dress looks great but the shoes are ALL WRONG. Can’t say we love the hair either.

Jenna Dewan in Rami Kashou

PR IN THE HOUSE, PART 2, Y’ALL. Also looks cute. Appropriately styled. She can stay.

Kristen Stewart in Yigal Azrouël Fall 2009

Don’t you just want to scrub her down? Chick looks dirty all the time. It’s a cute dress on the model but she is SO not working it. We’re pretending we don’t see the shoes. It’s too painful, kittens.

Lauren Conrad in Moschino Fall 2009

That’s a lot of dress, honey, and you are just not woman enough to pull it off. Did she have it altered? Because the silhouette is completely different.

LeAnn Rimes in a J. Mendel gown.

It’s almost like she wandered in from another event. It’s an alright dress, but it seems kind of self-consciously off-message for the night.

Leighton Meester in Emilio de la Morena Spring 2009 and Brian Atwood “Brie” purple suede booties

Love the shoes, but that dress cannot be saved. It’s more like a puzzle than a dress. “See if you can get to my lady bits in 4 moves or less.”

Megan Fox in Dolce & Gabbana paired with Louboutin sandals

Kind of a harsh look for her. The dress is fine and she’s certainly at the stage in her life and career when she can and should be showing off the smokin’ bod, but the hair and makeup are so not doing it.

Miley Cyrus in Moschino Cheap & Chic Spring 2009 collection and Louboutin shoes.

Look for me in my new movie, Hannah Montana: Teenage Cougar!

Sandra Bullock in Abaeté Fall 2009 and Azzedine Alaïa shoes

She’s all, “I’m here. I put on an expensive dress and painful shoes. You happy now? Just take the goddamn pictures, alright?”

Sienna Miller in Twenty8Twelve Fall 2009 with Nicholas Kirkwood shoes.

Super-cute. Everything is just right from hair to shoes.

Taraji P. Henson in Roberto Cavalli Spring 2009 Collection

Is this the new irony or something? Are we just not getting it or is it now hip for black actresses to show up at events dressed like maids? Some sort of statement? We’re confused.